It's Been Awhile

It's been a long time since I've written.  A lot has happened in these last few months.  All good things, but a lot to process.

Charlie proposed.  Yes.  He asked me to marry him.  And I am going to.  I know that not even a year ago I was questioning every aspect of my existence and especially any type of relationship that I may or may not have, but here I am.  It is a completely unexpected place with a completely unexpected person, but it's as close to perfection as mere mortals can have.  In the past I would be having panic attacks over the short period of time we've known each other (8 months), the fact that we both have kids, money, wedding planning, life planning, planning, planning, planning...  I'm not panicking though.  It's right.  I feel it in my bones.  I know, beyond the shadow of a doubt.

How do I know?  There are so, so many ways I know.  He is the kindest man I have ever met.  He has the patience of a saint and a smile that makes my stomach do flip-flops.  His voice makes my toes tingle and eases my mind.  He works tirelessly to help me with whatever I need and never, ever utters a complaint.  The biggest reason I know he is "it" is that  I was very firmly set in being single, and I was happy that way.  Happier than I had ever been, actually.  Something about him told me that it was okay to be with him and to just go with it.  I did.  I still am.  I fell in love with Charlie long before I ever realized it.  I was going with it and having fun.  Then I was having fun, loving it, and loving him.  He has given me the best months of my life.

I am happier than I knew could be possible.  Charlie has enriched my life in more ways than he could ever know or I could ever explain.  He gave me permission to be me without even knowing he did.  I feel truly lucky to have him by my side.

I LOVE YOU AND YOUR STINKY FEET MR. WEBER, AND I ALWAYS WILL!